I often feel as though I have lost myself since deciding to stay home.  Not only did I become a mother, but my career life and dreams no longer existed.  It now feels like my life is lived through Linus.  He comes first and I come last, and sometimes not at all.  My place feels unsteady and changing.  I used to throw myself into work, but now that work smiles, laughs, and cries.  Being a mother is harder and more rewarding than I ever thought possible, yet I feel unaccomplished as an individual.

Sometimes I think about going back to work, but I couldn’t live with someone else seeing all his firsts, comforting every cry, and enjoying every smile.  I want to have my own life and make a difference, not only through raising my child but directly from me.

-Tanya